Microsoft Tried to be Cool and Called Their Employees “Bae”- Surprisingly Didn’t go Well

Live look inside Microsoft’s HQ this morning:

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Source: Seattle Times– In the gamut of things Microsoft has had to apologize for lately, including a racist chatbot and sexy dancers, this might be one of the strangest: The company sent an email inviting interns to a party that begins: “Hey Bae Intern! <3’‘ and gets worse from there, offering “lots of dranks’‘ and the ability to “get lit on a Monday night.’‘

-Dina Bass

If I worked for Microsoft and I received that message then by all means I’m clearing my schedule. They tapped into three of my millennial intuitions:

  1. They called me “Bae”. Now I feel wanted, and maybe we can upgrade it to feeling needed because they threw this in there: “<3”
  2. I sure do love dranks. Drinks? Am I currently downing my daily dose of Centrum 70+ and shitting into my Depends? Leave the prune juice “drinks” at the old folks home and pour me my dranks.
  3. Being “Lit” on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday when Monday is a holiday is for the birds. Fill my Monday with uppers and downers until I’m “Lit” fam. I want to feel as uncomfortable as possible on Tuesday and let out beer farts in my cubicle.

Big ups to Microsoft corporate executives on out-nerding their nerd counterparts.

The powers at be apologized and issued a statement that said, “the email was poorly worded and not in keeping with our values as a company.” Need to stop them from getting ahead of themselves there. For something to be poorly worded you have to use real words not just puke letters into Windows 10.

Back when Ballmer was the CEO none of this would have happened.

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Let’s not try to be hip. Let’s make a bunch of computer stuff that Apple will steal, tuck our polo shirts into our underwear, and dance our faces off.

gifs: giphy




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